Talking Is Important
Talking about birth control is one way of showing that you care--about yourself and your partner.
Discussing your questions, doubts or fears with your partner can help bring you closer. This is no time for guessing. Pregnancy is a major event in anyone's life.
One birth control method--the condom--can also protect you from STD(sexually transmitted disease), including HIV.
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STD can make both men and women unable to have children. |
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HIV can be life threatening |
People often have trouble talking about birth control. They don't want to admit to themselves that they are having sex.
If you're afraid to talk about sex, you may need to think about whether you're ready to be having sex. What you and your partner decide about birth control can affect the rest of your lives.
Birth Control Makes Good Sense
Don't worry if talking about birth control seems "unromantic." Making sure you're protected won't spoil anything. But not protecting yourself can change your life forever.
Using birth control doesn't have to take away from sexual pleasure. Many couples make birth control a part of making love.
For example, a partner can help insert a diaphragm or put on a condom. Being sensitive to each other's needs is part of being close.
You'll probably feel more comfortable when you know you're protected. Freedom from worry can make sex more relaxing and enjoyable for both partners.
Getting Ready to Talk
Before you talk with your partner:
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Find out the facts about condoms, the pill, diaphragm, IUD and other methods. |
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Decide which method is best for you and why. It will be easier to talk to your partner if you are sure of yourself. |
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Think about how you want the talk to go. Being clear, calm, open and honest when you speak can help your partner respond in the same way. |
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Ask a close friend how she or he handled a discussion about birth control. Comparing ideas with a friend can be helpful. It can also give you practice talking about the subject. |
Asking for help
It may be easier for both of you if another person is present--especially when you need answers to questions.
People at health care and birth control clinics have lots of experience. Seek their advice.
Don't be afraid to ask questions. No one expects you to know all the answers--that's why you're asking for information and advice in the first place.
Don't leave your future to chance. And don't assume your partner will be offended if you want to discuss birth control. Chances are, he or she has been trying to bring up the subject with you!
How to Begin
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Plan what you want to say. |
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Pick a good moment to bring up the subject. Don't wait until you've started to have sex. Then it may be hard to slow down and talk about birth control. |
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Say something like, " It's not easy for me to say this, but I want to talk about birth control." Or "Let's be safe and use a condom" |
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Tell your partner what you know about birth control and how you feel about using it. |
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Keep a sense of humor. Being able to laugh together can make it easier to talk about sensitive subjects. |
Talking Tips
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Talking about sex is never easy. Almost everyone goes through some embarrassing moments. |
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Be honest about what you think and feel. |
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Don't accuse or blame your partner. It's hard to talk when one person is upset. (This often happens after an unplanned pregnancy, when couples didn't talk about birth control!) |
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Remember to Listen. Let your partner know you understand his or her point of view. Ask questions if you're not clear on what your partner is saying. |
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Feeling embarrassed is natural. You may not get past the shyness the first time you try to talk. Your partner may need time to think about what you've said. Be prepared to talk about it again. |
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You may not agree on what to do. You may not even agree that you need to talk. Relax. Try again later. |
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Don't have sex until you talk. Remind your partner how important birth control is to you. |
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Don't expect to talk only once. It's important to keep talking about this important topic. |